WHERE IN TARNATION WERE YOU?!? YOU'RE GOING THE RIGHT WAY FOR A SMACKED BOTTOM AND I DON'T CARE WHO KNOWS IT!!! (Love that expression!!!)

"People usually bring things on themselves." Is it true? To some extent. Some people go asking for trouble! I mean all these "tartletts" (young tarts)! Barely 15 and they dress like sluts! Society is decadent. No respite for the ugly and good or for the bad for that matter... We'll elaborate on this later...



"Ego-centrism means only loving yourself and not having enough love for anybody else. You care only for yourself." They (dunno who, people in general probably) say it takes one to know one and that you can only fully grasp a concept if you've lived it. You can't grasp what it's like being high if you've never taken drugs before, etc... More on this some other time...

There is this hilarious song in German called "Männer sind Schweine" (Men are pigs) by Die Ärzte, a German group, who actually sing in German!!! I'll post the lyris on here and translate 'em! Why? 'Cos I miss translating stuff from German to English, so here you'll see how "right" they are!!!

Hallo, mein Schatz, ich liebe Dich!
Du bist die einzige für mich!
Die anderen find ich alle doof,
deswegen mache ich Dir den Hof.

Du bist so anders, ganz speziell,
ich merke sowas immer schnell.
Jetzt zieh Dich aus und leg Dich hin,
weil ich so verliebt in Dich bin.

Gleich wird es dunkel, bald ist es Nacht,
da ist ein Wort der Warnung angebracht:

Männer sind Schweine.
Traue ihnen nicht, mein Kind.
Sie wollen alle das Eine,
weil Männer nun mal so sind.

Ein Mann fühlt sich erst dann als Mann,
wenn er es Dir besorgen kann.
Er lügt, daß sich die Balken biegen,
nur um Dich ins Bett zu kriegen.

Und dann am nächsten Morgen
weiß er nicht einmal mehr, wie Du heißt.
Rücksichtslos und ungehemmt,
Gefühle sind ihm völlig fremd.

Für ihn ist Liebe gleich Samenverlust.
Mädchen, sei Dir dessen stets bewußt.

Männer sind Schweine,
frage nicht nach Sonnenschein.
Ausnahmen gibt´s leider keine.
In jedem Mann steckt doch immer ein Schwein.

Männer sind Säue.
Glaube ihnen nicht ein Wort.
Sie schwör´n Dir ewige Treue
und dann am nächsten Morgen sind sie fort.

Yeah, yeah, yeaaah ...

Und falls Du doch den Fehler machst
und Dir nen Ehemann anlachst,
mutiert dein Rosenkavalier Dir bald
nach der Hochzeit auch zum Tier.

Doch zeigt er dann sein wahres Ich,
ganz unrasiert und widerlich:
Trinkt Bier, sieht fern und wird schnell fett
und rülpst und furzt im Ehebett.

Dann hast Du King-Kong zum Ehemann,
drum sag ich Dir, denk bitte stets daran:

Männer sind Schweine.
(Chor: Blöde Schweine, fiese Schweine,
fette Schweine, miese Schweine,
dumme Schweine, krumme Schweine,
geile Schweine)
Traue ihnen nicht, mein Kind.
Sie wollen alle nur das Eine,
für wahre Liebe sind sie blind.

Männer sind Ratten.
(Chor: Öde Schweine, fiese Schweine,
fette Schweine, diese Schweine,
stinkende Schweine, linke Schweine,
geile Schweine)
Begegne ihnen nur mit List.
Sie wollen alles begatten,
was nicht bei 3 auf den Bäumen ist.

Männer sind Schweine.
(Chor: Blinde Schweine, fiese Schweine,
eklige Schweine, miese Schweine,
dumme Schwein, Nazi-Schweine,
geile Schweine)
Frage nicht nach Sonnenschein.
Ausnahmen gibt´s leider keine,
in jedem Mann steckt doch ein Schwein.

Männer sind Autos,
(Chor: Wir wollen keine Bullenschweine.
Fette Schweine, miese Schweine,
Mollies und Steine gegen die Bullenschweine)
nur ohne Reserverad.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeaaah.

Now for the TRANSLATION!!!

Hello, my darling, I love you!
You are the only one for me!
I find all the others dumb,
that's why I'm courting you.

You are so different, very special,
I always notice something like that quickly.
Now get undressed and lie down,
because I'm so in love with you.

It's nearly dark, soon it will be night,
so a warning is called for:

Men are pigs.
Don't trust them, my child.
They all want the same thing,
because men just are that way.

A man only feels like a man,
when he can give it to you.
He lies through his teeth
just to get you in bed.

And then the next day
he can't even remember what you're called.
Thoughtless and uninhibited,
Feelings are unknown to him.

For him love equals loss of semen.
Girl, always be aware of this.

Men are pigs,
don't ask for sunshine.
Sadly there are no exceptions.
In every man there is a pig.

Men are sods.
Don't believe a word they say.
They swear to be eternally faithful
and then the next day they just disappear.

Yeah, yeah, yeaaah.

And if you do make that mistake
and pick a husband up*,
your noble suitor will soon change
into an animal after the wedding.

There he shows his true self,
completely unshaven and disgusting:
Drinks beer, watches TV and gets fat quickly
and burps and farts in the marriage-bed.

Then you've got King Kong as a husband,
that's why I'm telling you, please always think of this.

Men are pigs.
(Chorus: Stupid pigs, mean pigs,
fat pigs, appalling pigs,
dumb pigs, twisted pigs,
horny pigs)
Don't trust them, my child.
They all want the same thing,
they are blind for true love.

Men are rats.
(Chorus: Boring pigs, mean pigs,
fat pigs, these pigs,
stinking pigs, left pigs,
horny pigs)
Encounter them only with cunning.
They want to mate with everything
that isn't up a tree by three.

Men are pigs.
(Chorus: Blind pigs, mean pigs,
disgusting pigs, appalling pigs,
stupid pigs, Nazi-pigs,
horny pigs)
Don't ask for sunshine.
Sadly there are no exceptions.
In every man there is a pig.

Men are cars.
(Chorus: We don't want bull pigs,
fat pigs, appalling pigs,
Mollies** and stones against the bull pigs)
just without the spare tire.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeaaah.

* Metaphorically.
** Dunno what that means...
Simplistic view of men. True though... We had to sing this song in 6th grade during German... Why? Good question! It's quite funny and the tune is quite bouncy once again!

Now for a hilarious pun (this really happened, yesterday in fact, with Dit):
-I'm going to kill that woman (Nussbaum)!!!
''At some point you just have to let go of your hate(red) and walk away.''
-I'm going to be walkin' away alright. From a dead body!!!''
Wasn't that funny? Yeah it wasn't actually, was it?

Welcome to our ''new'' Friday rubric. Today really is Friday unlike that other rubric posted on Wednesday!! Today's topic is: What do YOU find is better or worse?
We'll start with the ''what do YOU think is WORSE?'' questions:

1. A person who talks too slow or a person who talks too fast?
2. Body odour (we'll limit this to the armpits) or bad breath?
3. Say you're in an empty train compartment except for one other person. That person is listening to music. Do you think it's worse when they sing along (badly) or make some rhythmic movement such as tapping their fingers on the table or feet?
4. Having your arm amputated or your leg surgically chopped off?
5. Physical pain (such as being stabbed) or mental pain (such as being stabbed in the back [metaphorically])?
6. Say you're sitting on the bus and you hear some of your classmates mention your name. They are talking about your [general sense of the word] hideous new haircut. Would you prefer to find out about their dislike this way or if they had said it to your face?
7. Hurting a friend to help them and thereby losing their friendship or keeping them as a friend and knowing they'll never be happy if they don't change?
8. A person being shallow or a person being ego-centric?
9. Being locked in darkness or being trapped in coldness?
10. Dwelling in the past or living in the future?
11. Lying to others or lying to yourself?
12. Someone having stinky feet or someone having bad breath (sort of like #2)?
13. Helping a friend or loosing a friend (like #7 condensed)?
14. Being late or missing it (refers to anything: a lecture, a program, etc...)?
15. Being burned or being frozen?
16. Dying of thirst or starving to death?
    

Now to the ''what do YOU find BETTER?'' section:

1. Doing what's right or doing what's easy?
2. Having many friends or a few you can rely on?
3. Having loved/been loved on true time and having had your heart broken into a trillion little pieces or going through life without loving?
4. Being thankful or being sorry. According to GB Shaw being thankful is accepting submission.
5. Being rich or being happy?

That's it... Dunno what else to add.
I'll answer some, not all.

1. Well, both extremes are annoying!
2. Depends whether that person talks to you or not, but body odour is worse, since you could always offer them a breath mint. You're not going to say: ''Here's a deo wipe.'', are you?
3. Singing is worse although the tapping is infuriating!!!
4. Loosing an arm is worse.
5. Mental pain.
6. Dunno, neither is good. If they don't say it to your face how will you change?
7. Being selfish, so cherishing their friendship over their happiness.
8. No comment.
9. According to James Blunt: coldness (in his -can't remember which one- song)
10. Seriously dunno.
11. According to the bible => yourself.
12. As long as they shut up and leave their shoes on, they are both OK.
13. Well, NOT helping the friend, but dunno.
14. I hate being late, I prefer to miss the whole thing! Dumb, but true.
15. Never really thought about it, but burning yourself is never a pleasurable experience.
16. Probably starving to death is worse.

Now for the ''which is better?'' questions:

1. Doing what's right is better, but not always simple.
2. Few and good is better than many who flee at the first site of danger.
3. Probably the first, although it's more painful.
4. Depends what you're sorry and thankful about.
5. Being happy, but being rich wouldn't be bad by any means...

THE END

Hey y'all! Remember that pretty weird song I told you about in '97 or '99? Well, thought I'd see whether I could find it on YouTube, savy? And I did!!! It's even weirder than I remember it as! The music video is hilarious and scary. The lyrics are funny. Highlight this next bit to find out which song I mean. Do it at your own risk. ==>> ''Kiss me where it smells funny'' <<==. Yeah, dunno why I thought of that now, but it was funny... Sort of...

It was too dark to see even Schmoosie, so I aimed randomly more or less at where she was sitting or in this case stretching.


Once again too dark to see anything, so the camera couldn't focus properly, I couldn't see where she was and she was moving which didn't make it easier. This was taken when Hedgy was there. She didn't know what to make of him.

Grisou- before Hedgy. Paw pads...

WARNING!!! WARNING!!! WARNING!!!
DUE TO BAD PHOTOGRAPHY SKILLS
THE EXPERIENCE OF LOOKING AT
THESE PICS MAY BE SLIGHTLY
!!!!!!!!!!!!IMPAIRED!!!!!!!!!!!!

POSTED BY THE DIRECTION

WARNING #2!!! WARNING #2!!! WARNING # 2!!!
CUTENESS ALERT!!! POSSIBILITY OF AN
OVERDOSE OF CUTENESS!!!
WARNING OVER.

More pics from Hedgy.

It's Hedgy from the side, waiting for more milk.


Yup, the bowl was too deep for him.


This is how he knocked the bowl over...


... and spilled the milk all over the floor!


We gave him some more. Alas, he knocked that over as well.


He lapped it up from the floor.


You can see his tongue!!!

Little black nosie.

Awwwwwwww. He's SO cute!!!


Running out of comments now...


Looks like he's wearing sunglasses.


He shook himself and his spikes made a rattling noise.


The next day there were two of them and they made strange snoring noises.


Hedgy from the back. Off to some new high-class adventures!

Awwwww. Drinking Grisou's (fat free!!!) milk. Grisou was NOT amused. He started meowing 'cos he'd seen the hedgehog through the kitchen door.

Talking about comments, maybe someone will comment on this. You don't have to update, just READ this and possibly, maybe, perhaps comment?
Auntie Margarete died today. Did you ever meet her? It's best for her really. Frankly being pumped full of morphine, knocked out all the time, with Kidney failure, liver sclerosis and an irremovable blood clot causing pain when awake is not a good... It's worse being a human when terminally ill, because at least you can put an animal down. Humans just have to suffer or be pumped full of drugs to the point of unconsciousness. What kind of life is that? She was slowly poisoning herself with alcohol and cigarettes. Imagine how much longer she could have lived without them...
After seeing what alcohol and smoking does to you, I don't think I'm ever going to drink a drop again!!! Sad, but we didn't really know her that well...
COMMENT OR I WILL KEEP POSTING RANDOM AND ANNOYING STUFF OR WORSE INCRIMINATING PICTURES OF YOU!!!!

Now for a ''poem'' (that doesn't rhyme really), full of second meanings! Can you see 'em?

Second Meanings
~~~~~~~~~~~~

Do you cry yourself to sleep every night?
Do you just not see the point
in going any further?

Do you see strange visions from the past
filled with joy and happiness
to which you can't relate?

Do you think to yourself: ''Leave me alone!
How dare you come in my dreams
and torture me???''

Do you feel like dancing like some do
to forget your pain and to remember
your pleasures from years ago?

unfinished version (probably will stay that way)

Didn't that just suck!?! Not only did it NOT rhyme, but there are no rhythm to it either!!! The last refrain was invented on the spot. Might finish it if someone COMMENTS!!!!!!!

Now we come to our ''new'' Friday rubric again (OK, just pretend today is Friday + last week was Friday the 13th): tune in for... er... What were this week's questions again? Oh, yes! Why do you look like a panda because of lack of sleep? The second is: What was YOUR shortest night? What are YOUR explanations? Let's find out!
What??? The rings under your eyes are caused by nasal congestion? You've got to be kidding... Why do they especially appear during ''lack of sleep'' periods then?!? This is more like it: Lack of sleep caused by depression, stress, etc..., aging, dehydration and allergies. Now the question is: why? Maybe because of blood vessels underneath? Why isn't there any good info??? What do YOU think? I'm startin' to look like a panda now...
Now for the second question: What was YOUR shortest night/longest day and why?
Now selecting a victimed volunteer, no a volunteered victim, still wrong, a VOLUNTEER again. (Drum rolls) And the winner is: Myself! Again. What a coincidence.
The first one was: Stefany had a party in March 2006 sometime. Wasn't planning to stay the night since she only lives one village away. Anyhow 1 O'Clock came and went. We stayed up till about 7 AM. Then slept 'til 11 AM and got up. So more or less ==>> from 10 AM to 7 AM = 21 hours. Then 4 hours of rest, then 11AM to 10 PM = 11 hours. So that was a 21 hour day.
Then there were loads of stress related insomnia. Some nights I didn't even know whether I slept at all 'cos there were no dreams and I always dream, even if I only sleep an hour. That doesn't really count though, because perhaps I dreamt of blackness.
The third time was after the Matu: stayed up from 07:30 AM until 05:00 AM. So, 21 and a half hours. Nothing like passing the Matu and not sleeping to make you really HAPPY. Sort of started seeing things and feeling watched, so it isn't a recommendable thing to do really.
The fouth time was flying to the Seychelles. Got up at 08:30 AM. It was an evening flight from Paris... Couldn't sleep properly on the airplane 'cos everytime I was nearly asleep there was a turbulence or the guy behind kicked my seat... So I gave up in the end. We arrived at 8AM, but that's not important. What is, is => went to bed at 11:30 PM. So, 08:30 PM Swiss time. So a 36 hour day... A whole day and a half. That isn't recommendable either...
Then since last Sunday: 4 hours a night, so 20 hour days. Except on weekends, had 7 hours and 5 hours sleep. Why? Stress is THE answer.
Enough of me, what about YOU? Yes, YOU Rhubarb and Raspberry/Strawberry?
Well lack of sleep does make you happy at least. Better than Prozac! Not that I would know, never took it...

White: me
Bizarre red-brown: Scottish Man

Scottish Man absolutely wanted you to hear his new sketch... Yes, it's brilliant!!! Scottish Man, what are you doing in my voice-over? Well, I'm better than you and it should me my voice over since it's my sketch!!! And they say I'm ego-centric... Scottish Man, shut up or else I won't type out your sketch!!! Good.
A: Can I borrow you're computer?
B: Sure it's over there.
A: Thanks. (starts disconnecting the PC)
B: Er... What are you doing?
A: I want to put it in my room to have more privacy.
B: That is out of the question!!! Put it back.
A: Chill! You said I could borrow it!
B: Yeah, but not like this...
A: Okay, Okay. (gets electrocuted whilst putting it back).
Told you it was brilliant!!! And funny! And witty.
Do you hear anyone laughing?
They are laughing SO loud that you can't hear 'em!!!
Whatever... As you can see boredom inspires you to do many things. This is another one of those ''what not to do'' situations...

Dunno really what to say... We're going to dissect a mouse soon. Poor thing. Poor little very common and destructive mouse. Wonder whether anyone will be sick... As long as they don't vomit on me..!
Not everybody is doing it. You're allowed to miss two Bio practicals without reason. If you're ill, you can bring a medical certificate. So the prof said we could use these two absences to NOT do the practicals. If you're a Hindu or Buddhist or something OR you can't go through with it, then you just don't inscribe yourself. What the heck they are doing Biology for is anyone's guess... Some people just can't be bothered to come AKA ''ma ex-lab partner'' (we don't have Chem or Physics practicals anymore and Bio is everyone for themselves). I think it's his B-day today. Haven't seen him all week come to think of it... So, we have the queasy, the lazy and normal. Once again, hopefully no limbs will be accidentally chopped off in the process!
It's flaming freezing in the A300 auditorium!!! Do they really need the air con on? They had it on ALL WINTER!!! I mean sure you need air circulation, but it's getting ridiculous! Instead of heating, they blow cold air in your face. Could have built an iglu it was so cold!

I er... accidentally fell asleep during Physics. We have a 15 minute break every 45 minutes and I thought I'd just (dunno how to explain it!!!) close my eyes for a few seconds, well the entire time actually. You know you "lean" on the table, put you arms on it and lay your head on them? Well must have dropped off, 'cos when I opened my eyes it was 11:30!!! The lecture starts at 11:15 normally. Dunno whether he started late or because my block fell down, either way something woke me. Luckily or I might still be sleeping now!!!
There should be a "random"-feeling HP head. That would be good...
Something really strange happened during complementary Chemistry on Friday. No, it wasn't super interesting. Now THAT would be strange! I was just thinking about how bizarre the "When I think about you I touch myself" song is from Austin Powers and right as I was thinking the word "touch", the professor said "toucher". How coincidental is that?! He was talking about about radioactive particles though... I found the "WItayItm" song on YouTube. Love the comments! "An after 1 AM work-out video"! I mean the tune is so bouncy and the lyrics so hilarious and repetitive...

I'm as screwed and dead as a decapitated, plucked (defeathered would sound better, if it existed...), disemboweled, stuffed, marinated, roasted, served with garnishes, cut up, eaten, digested and excreted dodo!!!
When "is that a dagger I see before me, the handle towards my hand" rings true. Just thought I'd integrate this into a topic/post one day...


I can see you! Lord of the rings... "My precioussssss...." Anyway, held a magnifying glass in front of the webcam... Once again "what not to do when you're bored"...
Talking about "an evil gleam"...

Ok, feel like posting something mega-stupid, so don't worry if it's weird.
During English we used to have to fill in thses dialogues. You recieved a paper on which some person asked you several questions about something or other and you write the response. Then the person will ask something else about it. In this example, Amy asks us about a Spice Girls concert. What she says is determined so "You" is the only variable.
Here goes:
Amy: Hey! Did you go to that Spice Girls concert yesterday?
You: Does it look like I enjoy the Spice Girls?
Amy: It was great, wasn't it?
You: I wouldn't know. I told you: I didn't go to it.
Amy: Who else went with you?
You: Nobody.
Amy: Did they enjoy it?
You: What part of "not going" did you not understand?!
Amy: Where did you sit?
You: Have you quite finished waisting my time?
Amy: That's good.
You: About as good as having to talk to you...
Amy: What are you doing this weekend?
You: How does that concern YOU?
Amy: Maybe we will see eachother there.
You: For all that is good and holly, I sure hope not!!! Are you trying to torture me?!
Amy: It was nice talking to you, but I've got somewhere important to be.
You: Thanks for waisting my time as well. Going to torment another helpless soul?
Amy: Good bye!
You: Piss off!!!
Amy: See you soon.
You: Not unless I shoot, er... I mean see you first!
Amy: Toodle-oo!
You: Hate that girl!!! (==>> like the Abbot from Robin Hood: Men in Tights: "+(stupid looking audience for the wedding member shouting) Hello, Abbot!!! -(Abbot in composed anger through clenched teeth) Hate that guy!)
That was pretty random. I used to do that at school! Without the swearing of course and not so evilly. It was fun and infuriating! Random, just like my mood:
Cute mouth!!! What mouth?

Do you ever feel incomplete as though somehow something was missing? Part of you somehow just vanished? We watched a series about birth in the UK. Apparently many people have a twin, but it is reabsorbed and only one individual survives. I'm sure I had a twin. Somehow part of me is missing... Maybe because I nearly had a brother... My mother never found out what gender it had. I'm sure it was a boy. She had a miscarriage early on (don't tell her I told you). No one knows why. He would have been I dunno 24 years old now. How can you miss someone who never existed? Why? Was he going to turn evil? Did he have a genetic disease? Why? Why did he have to die? An embryo! What wrong did he do? What awful sin did he commit? "It's just another routine miscarriage that no one can explain". That's my brother you're talking about and there's nothing "routine" about him dying! That or maybe I'm just weird... Who knows? Maybe it's just my inert bizarreness acting up again?

Here are some Easter photos. Yes, it sort of late, but later is better than never:


Oops, how did that happen? Dunno how to rotate it + can't be bothered to find out how. Anyway it's an Easter ... er... "bouquet".


These eggs are empty or else they'd hardly be able to stay hanging like that.


My mother painted 'em.


You puncture the raw chicken egg on either side with a needle and then you blow the egg white and yolk out. (Shut up, perverts out there! Don't think I don't know what you're thinking...)


Yep, another one.


And yet another one...


I think I did this one, not sure.


Startin' to get boring for you now...


These are hard boiled Chicken eggs, which were plunged into a vinegar-based edible paint. You colour the shell, so the shell stays on. You eat 'em later. German tradition. Don't ask.


Chocolate. How much does one have to eat to be happy?! The whole lot probably...


Aren't they cute??? Hey, wait a tick. Who put them on my Bio book?!? What an outrageous action! Sacrilege! That book cost me 120 Francs (they don't come cheap and yes I paid it myself)! Oh, wait I put them there... Oops... My bad (love that expression)!

"Wer nicht wird, wird Wirt." Translation: "Who can't, becomes a bartender." Sort of like: ''Who can, does. Who can't, teaches.'' This is for you Nussbaum: "Who can't teach, becomes a sports teacher."

When I was depressed I did think about suicide. Of course I never went through with it. Why? Because I'm too much of a coward. I spend hours with silent tears running down my cheeks and thinking how it could be possible to ever be happy again. A silent voice cried out from the darkness: "You are alone." I couldn't face what my parents and family would feel. Life is a gift. A gift to be cherished everyday. Even in the darkest of times. There are people who are much worse off, who have a reason to be depressed. No one would come to my funeral anyway, because nobody cares. They wouldn't even realize I'd have gone. Why am I forsaken by all? Being depressed means not caring for others, you are trapped inside yourself and others seem foreign to you.

Why does love never persevere? How can it fade? Can it be never-ending from a scientific point of view? The point is "to spread your seed". At least for males it is. Therefore it would only be logical that it fades, so the quest for a new partner can recommence.

Can there be peace on earth?
Sure when hell freezes over, manatees fly and dodos say: "I'm as dead as a human.'' Humans are greedy. They want they can't have and aren't happy with what they've got. The neighbour's garden looks greener, their house better and their money plentier, sorry plentiful. Once you've acquired an enormous fortune and you can have anything, you don't want it anymore because you CAN have it. If you eradicated everyone except for 10 people (5 men and 5 women) and dumped them in America (or anywhere seeing as no one else exists) there would be a war! Battles over the best woman, cheating, back-stabbing, best place to live, etc...

Some new pics of Grisou done with the computer.


Cute little nosey!


Ha! "Grandpa'' Grisou's head. Silky ears.


Aw, he looks SO sad and look at the cute little oval pupils and "The Nose"!


Weird position.
Nothing new from fur ball.

When did I notice? Well, I was listenig to the POTO music (got the CD) whilst doing Chemistry. I tend to seperate things rather than seeing them as a whole, so TMitIM was completely seperated from POTO. I never really thought about it before, it was when she said ''Don't Raoul, it's useless'' in ''the point of no return'' scene (take 2). Didn't know or rather had forgotten he was called Raoul. Always forget people's names in films...
That Harry Potter spoof with French, Saunders, Jeremy Irons, Basil Brush + people who's names I don't know is SO FUNNY!!! ''Better wig this time. Good length. More natural swing.'' Snape AKA Jeremy Irons. He also said: ''God, I'm gorgeous!'' They make him (Snape) kinda gay though, wonder whether that has any meaning... ''You're a woman, Harry.'' Dumbledore AKA dunno what he's called. Professor Magonagall: ''Am I Slytherin?''. Snape: ''No, dear I can understand every word you're saying.''. The spoof is better than the actual film! There's also a Saturday Night Live show, that's also multo comico ==>> Snape : ''Why aren't you children in bed? (After having seen Hermione, who incidentally has huge boobies). Hail! OK, let's break this up. Hermione, is that you? (she says ''yes, professor Snape.'') Please, call me Severus. No! Call me Snape. Professor Snape! OK, that's 50 points from Sly...Gryfindor each! Now go to bed!'' That was fun.
I've got news... ''What kind of news is it? You know I can't take bad news! The day started out so good. Had a good night's sleep, had a good BM. Now, what kind of news is it?'' this is YOUR reaction or something similar... Well the news is bad. ''I knew it..!''. Shut up, prince John! Trying to talk here. Good, as I was saying, the bad news is that our exams START on the 18th of June! You'll be here n' everything... We don't have the exact time table, so maybe the exams will have finished by the 22nd or maybe they'll start on the 23rd? Inconsiderate people ruining all the summer plans!
Now it's your turn to tell us somethin' 'bout yourself. Today's question is: What is the least amount of sleep you've ever had (or not have)? Have you ever not slept at all? How long has your longest day been? From when to when and why? On a side note, why does one look like a panda and get dark rings/circles under the eyes due to a lack of sleep?

"Do you have any idea what it's like when your soul and heart cry out for help, but you know the only person who can make a difference is you? No one understands you and you ask yourself "what is the point in life?''. Forsaken by all, standing alone in a crowded courtyard like being trapped inside emptiness, like floating through space. Everywhere you turn, evil stares brand mark you a "weirdo". You are left alone with no company but yourself. You try, make an effort. You are cast aside like a scrap of filth. Nobody cares, not really. What does it really mean when you say "I love you"? Is it just another feeble attempt to heighten your self-worth? Who will free me? Lies, evil lies obstruct your way. Words filled with contempt push you further down yet. "We are all just prisoners here of our own device''. Where are all the good people and where is God? Save me! You can't. First one must admit, then accept and then help one's self.''
Dunno what the '' are for, but never mind.
On a completely different note, have you noticed the "lovers" from POTO have the same names as they do in "The Man in the Iron Mask''? Raoul and Christine. What a coincidence! Both in Paris... (In TMitIM Christine is the kings mistress. He has her future husband exterminated: Raoul, son of Athos.)

Hey y'all! Can't sleep so decided to post some useless trivia for you. Welcome and tune in for an After Midnight Production:

Remember that Saturday Night Live spoof of Harry Potter with Lohan as Hermione and "Fred and George" say: "We're going to beat a couple bludgers"? Harmless, right? Actually not. It means the same as "choke the chicken", "crying yourself to sleep" or "interrogate the suspect". Give up? Oh, you want plain English? OK, well it means onanism. Still no good? Autosexual or egosexual could be synonyms... Still not? Can't make it clearer than that, I'm afraid. I can, but I won't, if you still don't get it, ask.

Here's a list of "taboo" words or expressions:
To mount (like mounting a horse = riding it)*, to take, balls, to hump (you can hump furniture around = carrying it)*, to do, to top, meat n' two veg (could refer to typical English meal, yes the edible kind, not an onanism)*, to drill, to lay/(get) laid, to nail, to plug, to plow, to poke, to ride, to root, to screw (screw driver n' screws or being screwed = ubber trouble)*, to smash, to have, how's your father, funny business, to swallow, to bang, to come (do you know what this means? Remember that word you asked my mother on the train to Devon..? Well, it means that => synonym: climax), to tame a dragon (Saturday Night Life, "Hagrid"), to lie on your back, how are you, playing Monopoly, to play, on the job, to roger, to want, HP, to blow, to suck, etc... You get the point, there are too many to name.
* Are for words that seem so obviously sexual, so there is an example of how they can be used "innocently".
See? Where's the love in all this? I'm going to turn cynical and not believe in love anymore at this rate. I mean, sure "attraction" or "animal magnetism", but what does it ultimately lead to? "Hopping on the good foot and doing the bad thing". Not that there's anything wrong with that, but it all boils down to procreation. Once again it's natural, humans are only animals and they too must obey the 4 (aren't there 5?) functions (breathing, excreting, eating [''absorbing'' nutrients] and procreating, although that is only for the survival of the species). Have you noticed that "true love'' frankly doesn't last a long time? If it did, why are the divorce rates so high? Look at our closest relations, (Gorillas and Chimpanzees), do they form monogamous relationships? You must be joking! It's a harem. Although the females do to some extent. They mate with one male, they are by no means faithful though... Conclusion: even if man considers himself to be at the height of evolution, he is not. A few millenniums ago, our ancestors lived in harems. Monogamy is not good. Of course I'm not prising polygamous groups, but anyway... Cynicism, sarcasm n' irony. What a mix!

Now for "in-jokes'' in Austin Powers: Dr Evil says "Preparation H feels good on the whole'' and his son responds: "Preparation H does feel good on the hole''. Preparation H is in fact a " popular brand of medication used in the treatment of hemorrhoids. It was originally packaged in a tube like toothpaste, with a similar consistency.'' (info from http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Preparation_H). It was applied locally... (Hemorrhoids are situated near your butt).
Mrs Fagina to Austin Powers: "You know in Japan, men come first and women come second." Austin Powers: "Or not at all! Hahahaha.'' Since we, or rather you, now know what "to come" means this is self-explanatory. Mrs Fagina is referring to their social station in life, whereas AP is referring to the sexual nature of that word, so "climax".
(It was POSTED AT 02:22, not WRITTEN at that time; started WRITING it at 00:57)

We had a party for my father's 60th B-day. 11 People came, 12 were supposed to. We had fish, since two of the guests were Vegetarians. My mother bought this pre-made Salmon + sauce from this woman who owns a little shop near the lake by Coppet. She makes it all herself. As you can see she doesn't only sell fish from the lake. It was very nice. It was a ''surprise'' although he caught me blowing the balloons up the evening before and it was impossible to keep it entirely secret. Bernd, Sue, his old colleague, 2 people from church he doesn't know, but who are nice and come from Yorkshire, ''the capital of England'' (quote from Dalziel from ''Dalziel and Pascoe'') and this English woman who's son is my age and used to come to my b-day parties as a kid, but her husband didn't turn up and the excuse was ''I don't know'', were invited. The cake was bought in Rapp, an expensive chocolate-producing shop. It was all good n' well, but why did they have to leave so flamin' late?
Well, things seem to be getting out of hand here. I did some short n' swift calculations. Hypothetically you can get 8 hrs of sleep during the week. So 5(working days) x 8 = 40 hrs a week + the weekend, so we'll say 10 hrs on a weekend. So (2 x 10) + 40 = 60 hrs in a ''real'' week. If we say the week starts on a Monday and ends on a Sunday an (which it does) and all weeks are calculated independently from each other, when you reach Wednesday of a new week, you should be up to 24 hrs of sleep ideally. See how much time sleeping wastes? To get back to why ''it's getting out of hand''. I'm up to about 12 hrs 58. As you can see slightly bellow the ideal value there. The average is about 4 hrs 16 a day, which is once again just minorly below the Utopian value mentioned further up. It's a real curse I can tell you. I could have a kip (actually that would deregulate my inner clock even more), however as soon as I get home, I'm too stressed to sleep and when it's a decent time (10 PM), the tiredness has past, too revved up to settle down. The train of sleep comes back around 2 AM-ish. It's not all bad, 'cos auto-fermentation (INVENTED [<- very important; it's NOT real] process in which the body produces alcohol instead of lactic acid, causing a high or drunken-like state, it was invented at school, 'cos every Friday Josephine would act as though she were drunk, although she hadn't drunk any alcohol) sets in. At least the depression's gone for now. So it's not all bad. You can't have everything. Imagine just how much time we'd save if ''anti-sleeping'' pills were invented! They would suck up the tiredness, leaving you energized. Sort of like mega-concentrated Caffeine pills. You could work/have fun 24/7! If they invented food pills as well, wouldn't even need to eat! 24/7, 365 days a year without needing to eat or sleep ever again! That would be so much extra time! Maybe I should take sleeping pills or something, although an Organic Chemistry book should do the trick as well! Plus don't really want to become addicted to them. Sometimes wonder whether 4 hours sleep is worth it? You feel more tired AFTER you slept than you would have done WITHOUT sleeping. Who knows?

Also did other calculations, you're coming over here in 2 months and 5 days. 65 days (without counting today)!!! 9 weeks and 2 days! Soon, soon, soon!
You can't say one word without there being some hidden meaning to it. Fair enough, but does it all have to be sexual? Take the harmless word such as swallowing. No harm in saying that, is there? Well, WRONG. You can't say coming either or even something like ''how are you?'' is no longer usable in polite society. I mean there's a whole list! If you knew what a ''tea-bagging'' is, you'd no longer use the word teabag. How do I know? Well there's a (gay -in the story only-) guy called T-Bag in ''Prison Break''. Partially because he is called Theodore, but there are other reasons (which were explained on a ''documentary'' or something)... I mean, nothing, not even the word sun is safe to use! See what being in a class of weirdoes does to you (from Moser)! You think like them. It's rather annoying and watching Austin Powers does NOT help!!! I've lost my sanity! It's gone. Oh well, now I'm even MORE crazy than before! And you know how I know? I had a bizarre dream, which I will elaborate on in due time -not now- and right at the end before I woke up, someone proclaimed: ''Watching Sponge Bob Square Pants makes me horny.'' I mean how weird is that? I was going to say something, but I woke up. I mean self-satisfy yourself by all means, but please don't do it in my dreams or say it out loud or do it to Sponge Bob Square Pants! Ok, this post is gettin' multo bizarro and before I loose my last shreds of sanity and friends I shall leave. Don't blame me, blame the dream! I was not lucid dreaming, so no control over it whatsoever.
Scientists say lack of sleep turns your brain to mush; I think I agree with them for once...

I plead insanity..!

I just found out that fatigue causes mental illness! I really am mental! Oh yeah and: cognitive performance deficits, decreased performance, sleep debt builds up over time (whoa am I in debt! I mean over the years: sleep deprivation through stress, temporary insomnia, more stress, etc...), also causes the person to be irritated, have a lack of vigilance (CONSTANT VIGILANCE!!!) and concentration, something called micro sleep and lapses => you fall asleep for 4-5 seconds without realizing. Also you look like a panda AND feel like a zombie most of the time. The only time you don't is when bed time comes. Probably you're too tired to notice that you're tired and also you get high/drunk without ''using'', so you're too happy to care. That also has to be a side-effect of fatigue. Anyhow, better get ready to dissect the fish, whilst hoping I don't amputate my fingers in the process!

Why must all good things come to an end? Why must sadness always triumph over happiness? (Got mathematical proof for that) Can I blame all my inadequacies on Nussbaum? (Even if I can't I will! It is her fault and she will pay! "Don't worry, I don't want you to die. No one deserves that. Not even you. I want you to suffer!". "Is this your dog? Oh, well he's got (names 50 ailments). Not to worry he'll get better! You only have to pay me 500 Frs to find out how." OR "Is this your animal? What the heck have you done to it!?! I'm calling the SPA and they'll make sure you never will own an animal again!!!" It is said that people receive their deserved punishment in life. Oh, yeah? Would it hurt to just help the process along a bit though? I must avenge my sanity somehow.)
Why do winners take it all and the losers take the fall? How can love persist in this shallow society? Does love exist or is it just another word for "wanting to sleep with someone"? Is love a reality? If it is then how come it is one-sided sometimes? How can the attraction not be mutual as it is with hatred? Is it ever lasting? Why do so many love-marriages fail? Why is the step between love and hatred so small? Can you love several people at once? (I believe you can, even if by loving the 1st person your love for the 2nd diminishes)
It is true love can mend your life, but love can break your heart.
Why? Who? What? These are the questions.
a) Why are we?
b) Who are we?
c) What is the point in life?
Answers (well sort of, these ARE metaphysical questions. I'm not saying I can find the answers in five minutes. After all Philosophers have been searching for centuries):
a) + c) go together => everyone has to find their own reason for living, whether it be for helping others or for themselves.
b) People need to find their own identity.
That was breath taking, wasn't it?
Why must people insist on explaining everything? Can't they just have faith? Would they be so much happier knowing that there was no life after death? Would they be happy if 1000s of people had no reason to live and committed suicide? (it would decrease the overflow of people) When people search for truth in religion and comfort in science it rarely helps, however looking for truth in science and comfort in religion is better. Why must people be condemned because of their religion?
I was right! Never trust a man with a tight arse! Tight-arsed means untrustworthy! Who's the best, who's the best? Am I good? I'm good! I didn't know, it was just a general observation. Tight-arsed guys always turned out to be the baddies AKA Sawyer. Yep, I'm obsessed with him! Now for a parody => First I wanted to be him, then I realized I wanted to be WITH him. Annoying phrase.
Thanx for the comment Rhubarb n' Strawberry, er... Raspberry. OK, from now on => Penny: Strawberry AND Raspberry; Lucie: Rhubarb AND another name of your choice.

Dunno whether you can see the streaks. This was taken on the 24th of March.

"Oh, when will the anguish stop? When will smiles be smiles again and not the evil snares they seem to be now? When will fleeting looks no longer seem be glaring? Why? Why have you forsaken me? Why does it seem like it always rains on me? Why am I so sad when the others are so glad?"
Sorry felt "poetic". Partially true. Sounds sort of paranoid.

Now for something you've all been waiting for! Here are some pictures of Paul AKA "The Cook".

The red person is a guest and the person behind the tree is the manageress. That leaves the guy on the right who is the slippery cook.

Thought it was a random person at the time...

Slacking off says you or rather Rhubarb? Looking for me says he. "Wer's glaubt wird selig!" Translation: "A likely story!"

Sun set on Bird Island. It felt like "Lost". We were all on the beach watching the turtles scuttle off!

See? Exactly like "Lost"! Standing on the beach, watching a natural phenomena to forget about being stuck on a "deserted" island.

Baby Hawk's bill turtle who hatched to late. It was really struggling to get out of my grip.
Most beautiful beach in the world on La Digue.
2nd most beautiful beach in the world on Praslin

Cute baby Gecko eating a marble cake crumb.

The fruit bat is hanging in the middle there. This is a GREEN orange tree.

Hanging up-side down. Cutey!

Dracula!!! You can even see his feet!

You can see all the details.

You can see his "hands".

View from the front.

Yep... Running out of comments now...

Too bad we didn't have a huge light to illuminate them from the bottom.

Only flying mammal! Gliding squirrels only glide; they can't fly.